Friday, October 25, 2013


Every time people see that I am pregnant with my fourth baby I get this wide eyed crazy lady stare. I realize most people these days only want a couple children, and mine are quite close together- but i LOVE having children! I always wanted four and though pregnancy is usually a little challenging for me I adore that the Lord has blessed my body and my heart with four little gifts.

This week I have been really gearing up and preparing for labor. I had a major mental shift recently from "I'm so tired and I always have to do too much work and not enough rest" and the internally selfish perspective of that to "I am SO ecstatic about where I am and that I get to give birth soon! What an honor!"

It came at the perfect time as well. This weekend was supposed to be a sort of "babymoon" for Bryce and I, a chance to get away together and be part of one of our most looked forward to events of the year. But as it stood it just wasn't working out and I felt the Lord grant peace over my heart in staying behind to be with our girls and rest up for the coming weeks. It would have been a difficult trip for me this late in pregnancy anyway. But it was a difficult decision as we desperately miss time together and need to get away! Plus sometimes being alone with little ones is a little frightening for me! Perspective is everything though isn't it? If you think about it, YES it is! You can change the outcome of your current situation JUST by changing your attitude. We try to teach our children this everyday, because as a kid you don't control much about your life. So we are sure to remind them that the one thing they do get to choose is what attitude they present to the world. I am not necessarily an excellent example of this, but as the Lord has been reminding me so much lately to be constantly evaluating my own attitude I feel that I'm improving!

So, this weekend is going to be, and has already started out as glorious! It has really made me excited about having three little girls! We spent time snuggling and watching princess shows, ate snacks, painted our nails, blow dried our hair after a warm bath, decided on sewing projects for the dolls, and even spoke to my parents on the phone. I have been working so much in the mornings lately that I've just missed these lazy days playing and enjoying my girls! I am now only working a couple days  a week which will really help my energy as well as helping them adjust before the baby comes. I can tell they are a little nervous and excited about the baby, so I want to bless them this last little bit of time so they know they are loved!

I am reading Ina May's guide to childbirth and BOY has it opened my eyes! I mean I have kinda steered toward hippyish these last few years anyway just by way of nutrition and health, but I hadn't really read into and understood birth as much as i should have five years ago! Birth is incredible and I am SO excited that i get to do it again!

Yes, I did just say that :) I know- every single time I talk to women about birth they think I am NUTS for not wanting epidurals, c section, or hospital birth. I hear almost every time "God made Dr.s and scientists to invent epidurals so you don't have to go through the pain!" But my perspective doesn't stem from pain, and it doesnt stem from trying to be macho or show up other women. I LOVE labor! It is NOT an illness, it is just treated like one! It is such an incredibly empowering gift that God made our bodies to not only put together a child inside of ourselves, but then gifted us with the ability to push the baby out! All the physiological, emotional and hormonal processes our bodies are intended to go through during labor are so amazing- yet generally missing when used in tandem with narcotics, interventions and surgery. It is mind blowing to me that women in our U.S. culture do not know that much about labor! We are so fearful of it that when a woman says she wants to go natural we think she's one of those weirdos trying to prove how awesome they are. But really it is a woman saying "I am not afraid of this process, I can mentally handle the pain, my body was made for this." It is a difference in perspective. As I said above, a choice in attitude.
No i don't mean to say that some C-sections are unavoidable, or that Dr.'s are bad- I mean to say how your labor goes should be your choice completely and should be approached without fear, but with excitement- giddy ridiculous excitement! You are marvelous! You are MADE to have this baby come out of you and not leave you broken!

Anyway, no high horse needed here- I do not see myself as better or stronger than any other woman out there, but i do know my perspective is different than most. I don't love pain, I love that my body can do this, I love proving to myself that God made me miraculous and with the insane ability to bring a child into the world without incident. I've had three very different birth experiences, and this one will also be quite different. I've experienced a lot with my three kids! I think this time is going to be so insanely joyous that I will not even be able to describe it to others. Fear free, panic free, busy-ness free, it is going to be amazing!

If you are planning to have babies or are pregnant- or want more kids you should definitely read this book by Ina May Gaskin! She has been a midwife since the 60s and has some incredible stories and insights into things that you may not realize are possible for you! It is a very empowering and freeing book, and will definitely prepare and excite you for labor even if you've never done it before. Don't believe the hype you see and hear from T.V. pregnancies or even your friends, labor is safe and beautiful!

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